Sermon Questions

1. Only let each person lead the life that the Lord has __________ to him, and to which God has __________ him. This is my rule in all the churches.
2. TRUE or FALSE: Per theologian Sinclair Ferguson, in gospel grammar: “God's indicatives are always the basis for God's imperatives”.
3. Related to question #2, identify the indicative and imperative in this statement: “What God does in his grace is the foundation for what we do in our response of faith and obedience.”
4. What three views of God does Paul address in the verses (1 Cor 7:8-17) and Pastor Grimm describes in his message?  
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8. What is the most desired result for a marriage before a divorce is sought?
9. What are the three areas of covenant breaking that Pastor Grimm detailed in his message that are concessions to divorce?
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13. TRUE or FALSE: The believer has the presence of Christ through the Spirit, and this access increases the possibility of salvation for the unbelieving spouse.
14. Identify the verses in the Gospel of Matthew where Jesus addresses the topic of divorce:

Discussion Questions

1. Read Mal 2:16, Matt 19:1-12, and Deut 24:1-4
2. What is the overall principle regarding marriage that we should take from these passages?
3. Compare and contrast the approach to divorce detailed in the Deut and Matthew passages. What is Jesus’s approach to divorce in Matt 19:1-12 vs the Deut 24:1-4 passage?
4. Imagine you are a counselor to a couple that has come to you to help them with their problems in marriage. These are the issues in their marriage that they outline to you. As a group, discuss the biblical principles that are found in 1 Cor 7:8-17 and in Pastor Grimm’s message governing these circumstances.
5. The wife has had a sexual relationship with a man outside the marriage 
6. The husband has been physically abusing his wife in retaliation for her extramarital relationship
7. The husband, who is an unbeliever, has decided to leave the home, at least for the time being
8. Read 1 Cor 1:28-31 and Eph 5:22-33.
9. Discuss how these verses and the principles influence the counsel that you give to the couple in question #2.
10. What other verses can you include in your counsel to this couple?
11. 1 Cor 7:17 says “Only let each person lead the life that the Lord has assigned to him, and to which God has called him.” Discuss this verse and its application to your marriage or singleness.

Sermon Outline

Read 1Corinthians 7:8-17

Pastor Matt examines how to recover and pursue God's design within the marriage as it relates to dealing with the brokenness of the world and so within the Corinthians. They have been wondering how to maintain a holy life. As we consider God's view of marriage in a broken world we need to be reminded of the presence of Christ and its impact on the believing church.

The apostle Paul lays down for us a foundation for which we can understand these life situations that relate to marital status. This can bring pain, hurt, regret, and sorrow. It is not easy, it is uncomfortable, and we need to take great care. But it is through our faith in Christ that we can walk through these times we live in and through these things by his presence in us. Paul talks about this and the truth of the gospel in each of them.

1Cor 1:2 - ²To the church of God that is in Corinth to those sanctified in Christ Jesus called to be saints together with all those who in every place call upon the name of our Lord Jesus Christ both their Lord and ours.

The word for sanctified and the word for saints come from the same root word hagios or hagioso which means to be holy unto the Lord to be set apart. Paul is saying they are positionally in Jesus Christ by faith, they are already positionally sanctified. Out of that reality they are called to live in holiness as the Saints, that they are declared to be in Christ. This trajectory is something that Paul often does. He starts with the truth of what God has done and then applies it to the people who have faith in Christ.

• A well-known theologian, Dr Sinclair Ferguson, talks about the truths declared in the indicative, the truths that are declared, and the imperative or the commands that follow.

Now here's the important point in gospel grammar: God's indicatives are always the basis for God's imperatives. This is why we often find the word therefore in the New Testament. It is because of who God is and what he has done for us in Christ that we should therefore respond in a certain way. What God does in his grace, the indicative is the foundation for what we do in our response of faith and obedience responding to his imperative. – Dr. Sinclair Ferguson.

That is the model we hope to follow and that is what we want to see in these truths that he's laid down for us as we look at how we respond to the issues of marriage and divorce.

• Paul describes the difference between a worldly view of status and wisdom and God's view.

1Corinthians 1:28-31 - ²⁸God chose what is low and despised in the world even things that are not to bring to nothing things that are ²⁹so that no human being might boast in the presence of God. ³⁰And because of him you are in Christ Jesus who became to us wisdom from God righteousness and sanctification and redemption,³¹so that as it is written “Let the one who boasts boast in the Lord.”

We boast in the work of Christ. It is he who makes us righteous, sanctifies us, and redeems us.

• He goes on in Chapter 3 to talk about his work as a church planter.

1Corinthians 3:10-11 - ¹⁰According to the grace of God given to me, like a skilled master builder I laid a foundation, and someone else is building upon it. Let each one take care how he builds upon it. ¹¹For no one can lay a foundation other than that which is laid, which is Jesus Christ.

Again, that indicative truth is the foundation of our faith and in all these things is Jesus.

When he talks about the Corinthians, in which this building is being built, he says...

1Corinthians 3:16-17 - ¹⁶ Do you not know that you are God’s temple and that God’s Spirit dwells in you? ¹⁷If anyone destroys God’s temple God will destroy him. For God’s temple is holy and you are that temple.

The presence of Christ in us is what makes us holy and what makes us his temple.

• Later on, he starts getting into these issues of disputes and sexual immorality. He reminds them that they're the Temple of God. He starts by saying now remember, this is the way you were.

1Corinthians 6:9-11 - ⁹Or do you not know that the unrighteous will not inherit the kingdom of God? Do not be deceived: neither the sexually immoral nor idolaters nor adulterers nor men who practice homosexuality ¹⁰nor thieves nor the greedy nor drunkards nor revilers nor swindlers will inherit the kingdom of God. ¹¹And such were some of you. But you were washed you were sanctified you were justified in the name of the Lord Jesus Christ and by the Spirit of our God.

That is the new reality, which is the truth.

He then says to them, especially as it relates to sexual immorality...

1Corinthians 6:17-20 - ¹⁷But he who is joined to the Lord becomes one spirit with him. ¹⁸Flee from sexual immorality. Every other sin a person commits is outside the body but the sexually immoral person sins against his own body. ¹⁹Or do you not know that your body is a temple of the Holy Spirit within you whom you have from God? You are not your own ²⁰for you were bought with a price. So glorify God in your body.

He is rooting the truth in that indicative reality again in all these things, in the presence of the spirit in them, by faith in Christ. You are not your own, you were bought with Christ.

• It is that truth of Christ in us that then flows into how we view our status whether we are married or not married. The Corinthians are concerned that their marital status may be affecting their sanctification. Whatever our marital status is, we trust in the presence of Christ in us to sanctify our lives. Changing our status will not bring sanctification, it is recognizing that who we are in Christ as he has laid the foundation. It is Christ who sanctifies us, and it is his presence in us that we bring into all these different situations. In our obedience to God’s design for marriage, there are 3 situations Paul addresses with Corinthians. First, regarding those who are no longer married. Second, regarding those considering or experiencing divorce. Third, regarding those who are married to an unbeliever.

God’s view of those no longer married

1Corinthians 7:8-9 - ⁸To the unmarried and the widows I say that it is good for them to remain single as I am. ⁹But if they cannot exercise self-control they should marry. For it is better to marry than to burn with passion.

Your status in Christ has not changed.

You are free to remain single or remarry.

Paul is inviting the unmarried and the widows to remain single as he is. Many scholars believe Paul was a faithful Pharisee before his conversion, and according to his Judaism, he was married at some point in his life and a widower at this point. The unmarried here is likely referring to men. He says to them it is good for you to remain as I am. He goes on later in Chapter 7 and talks about the power and work of the ministry and the Gospel. He knows because he is sanctified in Christ, he does not need to run off and get married again in order to be acceptable by God, he can remain as he is. We know that our status in Christ has not changed based on losing a spouse, therefore you are free to either remain single or to remarry. He says, if you desire to be married in sexual relation context, then get married according to God's design.

God’s view of divorce (and remarriage)

1Corinthians 7:10 11 - ¹⁰To the married I give this charge (not I, but the Lord): the wife should not separate from her husband ¹¹(but if she does she should remain unmarried or else be reconciled to her husband) and the husband should not divorce his wife.

God hates divorce but concedes to it because of sin.

Covenant breaking* is the rule for concession, but one should desire reconciliation.

*Adultery, Abandonment, Abuse (unrepentant).

Paul says to the married, I give this charge, not I, but the Lord. That reference not I, but the Lord, it is him. He is saying I know the teaching of the Lord Jesus, which we have in the Gospels. Paul is defining rules for separation in marriage. He has an extremely high view of marriage.

1Corinthians 7:10 11 - ¹⁰To the married I give this charge (not I, but the Lord): the wife should not separate from her husband ¹¹(but if she does she should remain unmarried or else be reconciled to her husband) and the husband should not divorce his wife.

(Matthew 5:32) and 19:8-9 - ⁸He said to them “Because of your hardness of heart Moses allowed you to divorce your wives but from the beginning it was not so. ⁹And I say to you: whoever divorces his wife except for sexual immorality and marries another commits adultery.”

We know in the Sermon on the Mount Jesus says so you have heard it said and he references the law and then he does a teaching on that. He does that in Matthew 5:32, but he does the same thing again in Matthew 19, in response to questions the Pharisees were trying to catch him on some kind of awful teaching.

• There was at that time a difference of opinion about the law in Deuteronomy 24:1.

Deuteronomy 24:1-4 - ¹“When a man takes a wife and marries her if then she finds no favor in his eyes because he has found some indecency in her and he writes her a certificate of divorce and puts it in her hand and sends her out of his house and she departs out of his house ²and if she goes and becomes another man’s wife ³and the latter man hates her and writes her a certificate of divorce and puts it in her hand and sends her out of his house or if the latter man dies who took her to be his wife ⁴then her former husband who sent her away may not take her again to be his wife after she has been defiled for that is an abomination before the Lord. And you shall not bring sin upon the land that the Lord your God is giving you for an inheritance.

Does this mean that a man can divorce a woman for any reason because he does not like her, she does not find favor in his eyes or is there a specific reason? Basically, there were some rabbis who practiced a no-fault divorce policy, but there were others who said no. The phrase some indecency in her is referring to sexual immorality, a severe covenant breaking of adultery.

• Jesus himself notices this in Matthew 5 and Matthew 19. He holds to that higher standard because the real issue is this severe covenant breaking that he is applying the wisdom of God to as we see here...

Matthew 19:8-9 - ⁸He said to them “Because of your hardness of heart Moses allowed you to divorce your wives but from the beginning it was not so. ⁹And I say to you: whoever divorces his wife except for sexual immorality and marries another commits adultery.”

Whoever divorces his wife except for sexual immorality and marries another commits adultery. Because of hardness of heart, Moses allowed them to divorce their wives. But from the beginning it was not so, and so he takes them back before Deuteronomy, before the fall, before sin that has brought about the need for a divorce.

• We see Jesus doing this earlier in Matthew 19 at the beginning of his conversation with the Pharisees.

Matthew 19:4-6 - ⁴He answered “Have you not read that he who created them from the beginning made them male and female ⁵and said ‘Therefore a man shall leave his father and his mother and hold fast to his wife and the two shall become one flesh’? ⁶So they are no longer two but one flesh. What therefore God has joined together let not man separate.”

He does not address the issue of marriage and divorce from the point of sin, he goes back to the indicative, the truth, the standard, and says this is what God has made marriage for. He is restoring that high standard and saying you are only doing this because you have hard hearts. We want to apply wisdom to those situations based on God's standard. That is why he says but from the beginning, it was not so. He says the standard is adultery, and sexual immorality. That covenant relationship is supposed to reflect our covenant relationship with God, and you violated that. That is a severe enough violation that God allows divorce. Paul says, remain unmarried or else be reconciled. We should desire reconciliation, but there is a concern for divorce. They can get a divorce, then on legitimate divorce grounds remarry. Paul applies that same high standard as he is looking at this situation also.

1Corinthians 7:15 – ¹⁵But if the unbelieving partner separates let it be so. In such cases the brother or sister is not enslaved. God has called you to peace.

This is an example of another form of legitimate covenant breaking. Desertion or abandonment would fall in line with the covenant breaking of adultery. If someone turns their back on their marriage and they remarry, or just leave them, it is as if that person is now dead. They would become like a widow or a widower. They don't exist in their marriage; they have broken that covenant.

• Later on, Paul talks about it again.

1Corinthians 7:39 – ³⁹A wife is bound to her husband as long as he lives. But if her husband dies she is free to be married to whom she wishes only in the Lord.

Death is also something that breaks the covenant. The language of she is free to be married is similar to the case that our brother or sister is not enslaved. We see that is the case that allows for that abandonment is similar, and they are free to remarry. Paul again applies that standard of what is the highest form of covenant breaking.

• There is another case that rises to that same high level of covenant breaking that adultery and abandonment does, and that would be of a continual ongoing, unrepentant abuse. Physical abuse could rise to that same level. We know that God does not like divorce. God's view on divorce is not His design, but he concedes to it because of sin. The rule for concession is severe covenant breaking. One should desire reconciliation; he concedes that covenant breaking is something that is allowed because of sin.

God’s view of marriage to an unbeliever

It is important to know that in this context, we are talking about someone who has come to faith in Christ, after they are married. This is not concerning marrying someone you know to be an unbeliever, because Paul actually addresses this in 1Corinthians 7, talking about someone who wants to remarry.

1Corinthians 7:39 – ³⁹A wife is bound to her husband as long as he lives. But if her husband dies she is free to be married to whom she wishes only in the Lord.

The phrase in the Lord means that they have this common faith in Christ.

• Then in the 2nd letter to the Corinthians, he says to them...

2Corinthians 6:14 - ¹⁴Do not be unequally yoked with unbelievers. For what partnership has righteousness with lawlessness? Or what fellowship has light with darkness?

We know the principle he is dealing with back in 1st Corinthians 10. He is dealing with someone who has come to faith after they have been married or they did not realize they were married to an unbeliever. Paul is clear; he says you should not divorce her or him if they consent to stay with you.

1Corinthians 7:12-14 - ¹²To the rest I say (I, not the Lord) that if any brother has a wife who is an unbeliever, and she consents to live with him, he should not divorce her. ¹³If any woman has a husband who is an unbeliever, and he consents to live with her, she should not divorce him. ¹⁴For the unbelieving husband is made holy because of his wife, and the unbelieving wife is made holy because of her husband. Otherwise your children would be unclean, but as it is, they are holy.

Stay married to a consenting spouse.

God views the marriage and children as holy.

He is not talking about someone’s eternal state in the Lord because they are not in the same manner, positionally justified and sanctified before the Lord because they are married to a believer. He is declaring that marriage itself is holy, because of the presence of the spirit in the unbeliever. God views the marriage and then subsequently the children, in the same way. They are declared to be under the protection, guidance and care of the family member who is sanctified. With that view, we should have a remarkably high view of the presence of Christ in our life and the power that comes with it, to influence and have an effect on others. The same identical thing is happening here within the family. Look at what Paul says later on...

1Corinthians 7:16 - ¹⁶For how do you know wife whether you will save your husband? Or how do you know husband whether you will save your wife?

The Believer has the presence of Christ through the Spirit, and this access increases the possibility of salvation.

Because of the presence of the spirit in you, there is a likelihood that they will be saved because they will be constantly under the influence and presence of the spirit through the believing spouse.

• We bring the presence of Christ wherever we are. When we encounter the brokenness of the world and the relationships that we are in, we know that we have the presence of Christ with us to live as overcomers. The sanctifying work of Jesus in our life is the greater power at work in the world. This is the view that we should hold in all three situations. He is our governing principle and our new life in him is what determines how we act and how we live. The reality is sin cannot be in the presence of God because it will be destroyed. There are all these protections and things for the people that kept them from that, but when God found a way in the presence of sin, he became Incarnate, he entered in, and he is living in us.

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