Questions:

1. Fill in the blanks below from Luke 10:39-42: And she had a sister called Mary, who sat at the Lord's feet and listened to his teaching. 40 But Martha was _________ with much ________. And she went up to him and said, “Lord, do you not care that my sister has left me to serve alone? Tell her then to help me.” 41 But the Lord answered her, “Martha, Martha, you are _________ and _________ about many things, 42 but one thing is necessary. Mary has chosen the ______ _______, which will not be taken away from her.”
2. TRUE or FALSE:  Mary was criticized by Jesus for not helping Martha serve.
3. The weight Martha carried is described as being __________ and upset about many things. 
4. What is described as the “drug” of our modern age?
5. Food
6. Work
7. Distraction (especially smartphones)
8. Entertainment
9. TRUE or FALSE According to Pastor Winans’ message, constant exposure to traumatic media can increase stress even more than being present at a traumatic event.
10. Match with their words from Pastor Winans message (Martha's Problem, Martha's Loss, Martha's Weight, Smartphone Addiction, Continuous Partial Attention)
11. Being worried and upset about many things.
12. Distracted from serving instead of listening.
13. The inability to focus deeply due to constant interruptions.
14. Missing the chance to sit at Jesus' feet
15. Cravings, withdrawal, and lost productivity from overuse.
16. According to the sermon, what was the “better portion” Mary chose?
17. Preparing food for Jesus
18. Avoiding responsibility
19. Sitting at Jesus’ feet and listening to Him
20. Talking with the disciples
21. TRUE or FALSE:  Multitasking actually strengthens focus and helps us retain information better.
22. TRUE or FALSE:  The sermon teaches that the real issue is not ultimately about phones, but about what we’re losing spiritually.

Discussion:

1. Read Luke 10:38-42 and discuss the following questions:
2. What was Martha’s main problem in Luke 10:38–42?
3. Why do you think Jesus affirmed Mary’s choice as the “better portion”?
4. Was Martha’s service in and of itself a cause for distraction, for worry? When did Martha’s service become a distraction for her? What choice did Martha make that made her service a distraction?
5. Consider what you are anxious about: how much of your anxiety is a result of choice(s) you make?
6. Consider the choice that Mary made and discuss what we can learn from her choice. Discuss what choices you can make that would bring the “better portion” into focus in your spiritual life.
7. Pastor Winans message compared distraction to an addiction, especially regarding smartphones.
8. Discuss in your group the strength of addiction to distractions like our smartphones: When you have nothing you are actively engaged in, do you have a reflex action to look at your phone, to look at email/text messages, check the news, check social media?
9. Discuss the concept of “continuous partial attention”: do you sense a loss of focus and concentration that may be due to constant exposure to news, social media, scrolling?
10. Discuss the difference between the attention you give to your phone or other similar distractions vs the focus you give to reading God’s Word, prayer, memorizing Scripture. What is the difference in terms of the time you give to each activity (phone vs Bible) and in terms of the level of concentration and focus you give to each activity.
11. Pastor Winans suggested practical steps like removing phones during prayer, turning off notifications, deleting distracting apps, and fasting from screens.
12. Which of these steps do you find most challenging, and which could you realistically try?
13. What does it mean for you personally to “choose the better portion” today?
14. The sermon ended with the reminder: “The weight of any loss is tied to the value of what’s lost.” How does this challenge you to reconsider the value of Christ in your daily life?
15. What kinds of “loss” happen when we give in to distraction instead of sitting with Jesus?
16. Discuss the effect of our testimony on the world when we give as much attention to the distractions of this world as the world does. How then should we respond?

Sermon Outline

Today, as we continue our conversation on fear and anxiety, I want us to consider what often gets in the way. If we’re called to live boldly—free from fear and anxiety—by marinating in God’s presence and promises, then what keeps us from doing that? To explore this, we’ll look at a passage in Luke chapter 10 that tells the story of two women who made two very different choices. One chose anxiety, the other chose peace. My hope is that as we study this together, we’ll be encouraged to turn away from the path of anxiety and instead choose the way of peace—discovering what that truly means for us today.

In Luke chapter 10, there are three things I want us to notice. First, the problem—and today we’ll focus mainly on Martha. Mary is present in the story, but Martha’s response is where we’ll place our attention. What exactly was Martha’s problem, as Jesus described it? Second, the loss—because of Martha’s choice, something important was missed. What did she lose, and how might we experience the same kind of loss in our own lives? Finally, the weight—the burden Martha carried as a result of her choice. As we reflect, we’ll see ourselves in her story. And my hope is that we’ll leave today choosing differently: choosing the better portion, choosing to sit at Jesus’ feet, and learning to marinate in God’s presence, His promises, and prayer.

The Problem

The problem is Martha is distracted.

Luke 10:39-40 – ³⁹And she had a sister called Mary, who sat at the Lord’s feet and listened to his teaching. ⁴⁰But Martha was distracted with much serving.

That distraction kept Martha from the better portion Mary had chosen. The truth is, we are all prone to distraction. But in our day, the pull of distraction is especially strong. What is it that consumes our attention today? Most of us carry it around in our pockets. In fact, I’d be willing to guess you have it with you right now. As one person has said…

We're all addicts. And the drug is distraction. – Dr. Carder Stout We are all Addicts

When we hear the word addiction, we usually think of alcohol, drugs, gambling, or pornography. Applying that language to technology—or even to our phones—might sound unusual. But I want us to at least open that conversation today. The American Addiction Center studies addictions of all kinds, and they’ve identified key criteria for recognizing when someone is addicted. Now, here’s the challenge: take that same list and simply replace the word substance with smartphone—and then ask yourself what you see.

• Taking the substance for long periods of time or in larger amounts than intended. Have you ever planned to glance at your phone for just a moment, but then noticed twenty minutes had slipped away?
• Being unable to cut down or stop substance use. We often resolve to cut back on phone use, only to realize that following through is far harder than we thought.
• Experiencing cravings, or intense desires or urges for the phone. What do you feel when your phone suddenly isn’t where you thought it was?
• Failing to fulfill obligations at home, work, or school due to substance abuse. How much productivity is lost in the workplace simply because of time spent on phones? We may not know the full answer, but one thing is clear: academic performance among students has sharply declined—and the timing lines up directly with the rise of the smartphone.
• Giving up social, recreational, or occupational activities due to substance abuse. I once spent more time outdoors, reading, enjoying hobbies, listening to music, and being present with friends. But little by little, those things have slipped away, replaced by more and more time consumed by my phone.
• Performing risky behaviors while intoxicated. Every year, cell phones are linked to roughly 1.3 million car accidents and more than 3,000 deaths on the road.
• Continuing using the phone despite having a physical or mental problem, that is probably due to substance abuse. The data is undeniable: rates of fear, anxiety, depression, and even suicide are rising, especially among young people, though not limited to them. And the timing of this sharp increase lines up directly with the introduction of the smartphone.
• Experiencing withdrawal symptoms when substance use stops. What happens when you take a smartphone from a young person? It's not just phones, but that's what we're talking about now. What do we mean by withdrawal symptoms? This is anger and irritability, restlessness, mood swings, and inability to sleep. These aren't just emotional responses, they're actual withdrawal symptoms that people are experiencing as you're taking away their substance, as you're taking away their addiction.

How much time do we actually spend on our phones? Studies—focused mainly on students but true across generations—show that the average is about five and a half hours a day on a smartphone. That doesn’t even include time in front of other screens. Some spend up to six hours a day on social media alone. Add it up, and that equals roughly twenty-five years of your life spent scrolling. Three out of four people admit this habit negatively impacts their well-being and performance, yet they keep doing it. Seventy percent even say they want to cut back but can’t. Why? Because it’s an addiction.

“There are only two industries that call their customers ‘users’: illegal drugs and software.” – Edward Tufte Statistician and Professor Emeritus at Yale University

Why is this so powerful? Because with apps like social media, you’re not the customer—you’re the product. That’s why they’re free. Your data is what gets sold to advertisers, who then use it to target you more precisely. And the apps are intentionally designed to keep you engaged. The longer you’re plugged in, the more profit they make. Developers know this; they understand human behavior and even the principles of addiction. So your phone isn’t addictive by accident, it’s engineered that way.

If Martha was too distracted to choose the better portion, what about us? Our struggle isn’t just with smartphones, it’s with discipleship. When we’re so absorbed by our devices that they dominate our attention, we risk losing the most vital connection of all: our daily, life-giving relationship with Christ.

The Loss

If addiction is the problem, then what exactly is the loss? Think of Jesus’ words to Mary and Martha. Martha’s distractions kept her from what mattered most. Her loss was the better portion, the very thing of greatest value.

Luke 10:41-42(NIV) – ⁴¹“Martha, Martha,” the Lord answered, “you are worried and upset about many things, ⁴²but few things are needed—or indeed only one. Mary has chosen what is better, and it will not be taken away from her.”

Martha missed the priceless moment to sit at Jesus’ feet, forfeiting the deeper connection with Him that Mary embraced. How does that speak to our lives today? We may not be bustling in a kitchen, but many of us are just as distracted—captured by the pull of our phones. The loss is real. Every hour spent endlessly scrolling dulls our focus and steals from the attention we could be giving to Christ. Even science confirms it—our brains show the strain. But more importantly, our souls feel the strain when we trade the better portion for what cannot satisfy.

This is showing where the brain is working extra hard compared to non-addicted brain when asked to do actually, a pretty simple task. – Dr. Brent Nelson Newport healthcare

Why is it that even simple tasks can feel overwhelming? The problem is something called attention fragmentation. We’ve trained our minds to jump constantly from one thing to the next. Multitasking, though praised by the world, is a myth—we can only give our attention fully to one thing at a time. Each shift drains energy, and over time, the constant switching leaves us weary and unfocused. That matters deeply. If our minds are conditioned to distraction, then even believers find it difficult to sit still and read. Sustained focus becomes a battle. And what’s at stake? Our time in God’s Word. We risk losing the practice of marinating in His promises, meditating on His truth, and being shaped by His voice because we can’t slow down long enough to listen. And the loss goes even deeper: when attention fragments, stillness vanishes. We lose the quiet, the solitude, the sacred space where God speaks to our hearts.

The constant scrolling and the interruptions from our phones have created a phenomenon of ‘continuous partial attention,’ which undermines our ability to focus and think deeply. - Gloria Mark Ph.D. Attention Span

There’s a part of your brain that doesn’t activate unless you stop—unless you’re still. Scripture calls us to this again and again: “Be still, and know that I am God.” Stillness isn’t optional; it’s essential to our discipleship walk with Christ. Yet we are losing that ability. Why? Because the part of the brain designed for reflection—the default mode network—only turns on when we slow down long enough to be still.

When you use the default mode network of your brain, your mind wanders, and thinks about, for example, big questions of meaning in your life. What does my life mean? - Arthur Brooks

But what happens if this part of your brain never turns on? Then you stop asking the deeper questions. And that’s part of why anxiety is so widespread in our culture—people are losing their sense of meaning and purpose. One major reason is that they never even pause to ask those questions, because the part of the brain designed for reflection isn’t being activated.

One of the reasons we have such an explosion of depression and anxiety in our society today is because people don't know the meaning of their lives...Tons if data show this, and furthermore, we're not even looking. – Arthur Brooks

Why doesn’t the mind’s default network ever switch on? Because we’ve forgotten how to be still. Take a simple example: I’m standing in line at Meijer. The wait is a little long, and almost without thinking, I pull out my phone. Or picture a red light—how many of us immediately glance down to check for a message? We’ve lost the ability to pause. We don’t even know how to be bored anymore. Instead, we’ve trained our minds to crave constant distraction, never resting, never quiet.

And this seeps into our spiritual lives. Even in prayer, how often do we sit down with our phone beside us—only to have our attention stolen within moments? But here’s the real issue: it’s not ultimately about phones. It’s about what we’re losing. Like Martha, we risk missing the one thing that matters most—time at the feet of Jesus.

The Weight

What do we mean by the wait? Jesus tells Martha...

Luke 10:41-42(NIV) – ⁴¹“Martha, Martha,” the Lord answered, “you are worried and upset about many things, ⁴²but few things are needed—or indeed only one. Mary has chosen what is better, and it will not be taken away from her.”

With our phones in hand, it feels as though we carry instant, almost infinite, God-like powers. We have access to endless knowledge, we can be “present” everywhere at once, and the whole world is delivered to our screens. But consider this: is most of the news you consume positive or negative? Day after day, every tragedy, every trauma, every catastrophe on the planet is streamed directly to us with instant access. As Andrew Solomon once said…

An endless bombardment of news and gossip and images has rendered us manic information addicts. It broke me. It might break you, too. – Andrew Sullivan ‘I Used to be a Human Being’

They conducted a fascinating study on the Boston Marathon bombing. Researchers took a control group—people who weren’t present at the event—and had them consume media coverage about it for at least six hours a day over a set period of time. Here’s what they discovered.

Six or more daily hours of exposure to media coverage of the Boston Marathon bombings in the week afterward was linked to more acute stress than having been at or near the marathon.

The study’s findings are sobering: the more we repeatedly consume media, the more our stress and anxiety levels can actually climb—sometimes even higher than those who lived through the event in person. “Do you really believe this hasn’t touched you?” The report goes on to reveal even more.

Repeated engaging with trauma-related media content for several hours daily...may prolong acute stress experiences and promote substantial stress-related symptomology. Mass media may become a conduit that spreads negative consequences of community trauma beyond directly affected communities. – Dr. Allison Holman

Constant exposure to media—every tragedy, every trauma—reshapes us. Just recently, Charlie Kirk was killed. When I picked up my son, he said, “Dad, someone sent me a video of Charlie Kirk being killed. Do you want to see it?” My answer was simple: “No, I don’t want to see that—and you shouldn’t either.” He’s only 15, and he never should have been confronted with something like that.

We can’t pretend this leaves us untouched. Each video, each headline, each horrific image presses in on us, shaping our souls. It’s not just the trauma itself, but the endless commentary, the constant stream of voices telling us who to hate, what to fear, and where to direct our anger. We’re being flooded. And in the process, we’re not sitting at Jesus’ feet. We’re missing what matters most, carrying a weight that was never meant for us to carry—a weight only God was meant to bear.

So how do we respond? How do we hear Jesus’ invitation to choose the better portion? Because this is bigger than the smartphone, the phone is just the presenting issue. The deeper question is: what can we do? Let me share a few practical things to remember.

• Keep your phone in another room when you need to focus. When you pray or read the Bible, don’t keep your phone beside you. And if you wear a smartwatch, consider taking it off—unless you truly need it for medical reasons. The goal is simple: remove the distractions. Put the phone in another room if you can. Create space where you can focus fully, without interruption, so you can truly sit at Jesus’ feet.
• Change your settings to turn off push notifications. Turn those notifications off. Every ding and buzz pulls at your attention and fragments your focus. Silence them—at least as much as you can—so your mind and heart can stay centered.
• Delete games or apps that consume too much time. You know the apps I’m talking about. I remember a game I used to play—I’d close it, then immediately find myself opening it again. Eventually, I realized: I had to delete it. For some, it’s social media—Instagram, TikTok, Snapchat—the worst offenders when it comes to stealing our time and attention. For others, it might be pornography, online shopping, or gambling. Whatever it is for you, if it’s pulling you in and keeping you hooked, the best thing you can do is remove it. If it’s consuming too much of your life, get it off your phone.
• Take a break from social media. Better yet, get off it completely. A couple of weeks ago, I deleted social media from my phone. Why? Because I want my phone to be a tool, not a slot machine. Maybe that’s a step you need to take too. Removing social media from your phone doesn’t mean you can’t access it elsewhere, it just means you’re not carrying it with you everywhere you go. Social media may have its place, but for some of us, it may not. And for many, the healthiest choice is simply to take it off your phone.
• Take regular technology breaks and screen fasts. Addiction has real biochemical roots. But when you fast, you give your body and mind a chance to reset. Fasting helps restore balance, breaking the constant cycle of reaching, scrolling, and losing focus, and allowing you to return to a healthier, more natural state.

As we close, let’s ask—why does this really matter? Is it about avoiding “evil phones”? No. The reason it matters is because of the invitation we’ve been given. Our Savior—the One who created all things, who shed His blood and died for us—invites us to sit at His feet. He calls us to read, to marinate in His Word, to meditate on His truth, to live in His presence, and to grow in our relationship with Him.

And here’s the reality: the weight of any loss is always tied to the value of what’s lost. Losing a penny isn’t the same as losing a quarter. So let me ask you—what is the value of Christ? If He is of infinite worth, then what is the loss when we neglect Him? Is it worth it to take steps, even hard ones, so we don’t miss out on what matters most—life with Him?

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