Questions:

1. Test your Bible memory: write out the first through the nine commandments:
2. TRUE or FALSE:  In ancient Israel, the testimony of one witness was sufficient for conviction.
3. In the courtroom system of ancient Israel, who had to cast the first stone if the sentence was death?
4. A family member of the victim
5. The accused themselves
6. The accuser
7. The priest
8. Martin Luther said, “A reputation is something quickly ______ but not quickly ______.”
9. Match the term with its definition (Slander, Libel, Gossip, Defamation, Truth in Love):
10. Lies written in text, email, or media
11. Speaking the truth in both words and lifestyle, marked by compassion
12. Broad term for destroying someone's good name through falsehood
13. Spreading information-true or false-that damages a person's reputation
14. Spoken lies meant to harm someone's reputation
15. According to Ephesians 4:15, Christians are called to:
16. Speak the truth in love
17. Speak only when necessary
18. Keep silent to avoid conflict
19. Always defend themselves first
20. Proverbs 18:21 teaches, “Death and life are in the power of the ______.”
21. TRUE or FALSE: The Heidelberg Catechism teaches that the Ninth Commandment only requires us not to lie.

Discussion:

1. Read again Exodus 20:16 and discuss the following:
2. How does the Ninth Commandment extend beyond the courtroom and apply to everyday life?
3. What makes gossip particularly destructive compared to other types of lying?
4. When does sharing information with others become less about love for another and more about gossip? How do you prevent your conversations from slipping into gossip?
5. How do slander and libel show up in today’s culture, especially with technology and social media?
6. Why do think our culture seem bent of tearing down vs building up?
7. Do we seem to follow this tendency to tear down politicians, media personalities, sports figures, etc., vs seeing them as made by God in his image?
8. In his message, Pastor Tweedie talked about the balance between speaking truth vs love.
9. Which one do you most often fall into?
10. What does it mean to “speak the truth in love” (Ephesians 4:15), and why is balancing truth and love so difficult?
11. Can you think of a time when someone told you a hard truth in love? How did it impact you?
12. Would you have the courage to speak a difficult truth to someone you love that may cause hurt feelings? What ultimate truth about a person’s spiritual life would cause to you speak the truth more boldly?
13. Discuss how we might approach our own comfort vs. the threat to someone’s eternal destiny. How would Jesus advise us to approach this tension between our comfort vs speaking the truth?
14. Discuss how we can, as a community of believers, help each other:
15. Live out the call to truth and avoid the trap of gossip or dishonesty?
16. Develop faith to speak the truth in love when we know it may harm a relationship? When we might risk the approval from others?

Sermon Outline

Today, we turn our attention to the Ninth Commandment.

Exodus 20:16 – ¹⁶“You shall not bear false witness against your neighbor.

The immediate context of this commandment is the courtroom, where it addresses the testimony of witnesses in public trials. “You shall not bear false witness against your neighbor.” The word neighbor originally referred to fellow members of God’s people, yet Jesus later expanded it to mean everyone, as seen in the parable of the Good Samaritan. To grasp this commandment, it helps to look at how justice worked in the time of Moses. In the ancient Middle East, those accused of crimes were presumed guilty until proven innocent. Without modern forensic evidence, cases often rested entirely on witness testimony, and many courts would convict on the word of a single witness. Defendants frequently had no chance to defend themselves.

God, in His wisdom, established a different standard in Israel. Trials were conducted before a jury of elders, and the testimony of one witness was never enough—at least two were required (Numbers 35:30; Deuteronomy 17:6). If the sentence was death, the accuser had to cast the first stone, ensuring that accusations carried personal accountability. A false accuser would then face punishment under the Law of Moses, a safeguard against false charges and frivolous claims. These protections were designed to shield the innocent from injustice. God’s command was unmistakable: no one was to bear false witness.

Like the other commandments, this one extends beyond its immediate context. Just as “do not steal” also calls us to be generous, and “do not commit adultery” warns against impure thoughts as well as actions, the commandment against false witness also forbids all lying. Moses even uses the Hebrew word kazab—meaning deceit or falsehood—making clear that any form of lying is prohibited. The New Testament continues this emphasis, with the Apostle Paul explicitly condemning dishonesty.

Colossians 3:9 – ⁹Do not lie to one another, seeing that you have put off the old self with its practices.

Ephesians 4:25 – ²⁵Therefore, having put away falsehood, let each one of you speak the truth with his neighbor, for we are members one of another.

We Must Put Away Lying

There are many forms of lying. Some are the big deceptions that make headlines, but others are the smaller, everyday falsehoods—flattery that isn’t sincere, half-truths, or so-called “white lies.” We lie when we tell only part of the story, leaving out details that might not favor us. We lie when we exaggerate our achievements, padding a resumé to appear more impressive. We lie when we magnify someone else’s shortcomings, or when we twist their words and strip them of their true meaning. The most serious violation of the Ninth Commandment, however, is any lie that causes harm to another person. Gossip is one of the most destructive forms of something Scripture repeatedly condemns. Gossip tears down reputations, casting others in a negative light and damaging how they are seen by those around them. And reputations matter deeply to God, as His Word makes clear.

Proverbs 22:1 – ¹A good name is to be chosen rather than great riches...

But you see, gossip tries to steal that treasure of a person's good reputation. Words are used to tear others down. Martin Luther said...

“A reputation is something quickly stolen but not quickly returned.” – Martin Luther

Let’s pause to define some terms we use when talking about lies. What do we call it when someone spreads falsehoods that damage another person’s reputation? In legal language, that’s called defamation—a false accusation or attack intended to destroy someone’s good name. Defamation can take two forms: slander and libel. Slander refers to spoken lies about a person, group, or business, while libel refers to lies put into writing—including texts, emails, or social media posts. Sadly, you don’t have to scroll long on social media to find examples of people who feel emboldened to tear others down. Comments often drip with cruelty and viciousness, with no hesitation about fabricating stories just to harm someone’s reputation. It’s bad enough to entertain slanderous thoughts, but when those lies are published for the world to see, the damage can be lasting—sometimes irreparable. As Philip Ryken reminds us, gossip and slander wield tremendous power to wound.

“The victims of gossip never get to defend themselves. They never have a chance to explain their circumstances, clarify their motives, or correct the misconceptions that people have about them. Instead, they are charged, tried, and convicted in the court of public opinion...” – Philip Ryken, Written in Stone

Shifting our focus for a moment, each of the Ten Commandments not only forbids something but also calls us to its positive opposite. Applied to the Ninth Commandment, if lying is prohibited, then what is required is the active pursuit of truth—speaking it, living it, and promoting it.

We Must Speak and Promote the Truth

We need to stand up for the truth, and that's not easy. George Orwell said, “In a time of universal deceit, telling the truth is a revolutionary act.” We live in a culture of lies.

Even small lies have a way of catching up with us. George O’Leary lost his dream job at Notre Dame because of a resumé embellishment he had written decades earlier. What seemed insignificant at the time eventually cost him both his position and his reputation. The Ninth Commandment reminds us that truth matters, and dishonesty—no matter how small—can bring devastating consequences.

In America, lying on a resumé is often seen as a measure of how badly someone wants the job. That idea stuck with me over the past couple of weeks, especially when I came across a survey revealing just how many job applicants admit to falsifying their resumés.

2023 Survey of Job Applicants – Andrew Fennel, Standout CV

• 64%      lied on their resumé.
• 80%      were 18–25-year-olds.
• 25%      lied about employer references.
• 30%      lied about their college degree.
• 73%      would consider using AI tools to embellish or lie on future resumés.

With so many lies circulating, it’s not surprising that a recent Barna Group study found half of young Christians believe there is no objective standard for truth. We live in a culture of deception, business, politics, academia, research, and journalism. The list is endless. Just scan the daily headlines and you’ll see it. But no matter what falsehoods are common in your field or community, God calls us to be different. We are to speak and promote the truth because we serve a truth-speaking God. Jesus declared of His Father, “Your word is truth,” and of Himself, “I am the truth.” The Holy Spirit is called “the Spirit of truth.” Truth is at the very heart of God’s character, and as His image-bearers we are called, by the Spirit’s help, to reflect that character more and more.

This also ties directly to God’s command to love our neighbor as ourselves. Just as we desire honesty from others, we must be truthful with them. Speaking truth is one way we love our neighbor. The Heidelberg Catechism captures this beautifully in Question 112: What is required in the Ninth Commandment? The answer reminds us that truth is not only to be spoken but also upheld and defended, for the honor of God and the good of others.

“I must love the truth, speak and confess it honestly, and do what I can to defend and promote my neighbor's honor and reputation.” – Heidelberg Catechism #112

We are called to be people of truth. As Paul reminded the Ephesians...

Ephesians 4:25 (NLT) – ²⁵Stop telling lies. Let us tell our neighbors the truth, for we are all parts of the same body.

Paul also said...

Ephesians 4:15 – ¹⁵...speaking the truth in love, we are to grow up in every way into him who is the head, into Christ.

In the original language, the phrase “speaking the truth in love” is more literally rendered “truthing in love.” We don’t have an English verb for “to truth,” but I like that picture—it suggests truth is not only what we say, but how we live. Our words, our actions, and our interactions with others are all to be shaped by truthfulness. So, what does truthing in love look like? First, it means our words should build others up and bring grace to those who hear. We are called to listen first, and then to speak words that encourage and lift others up—words seasoned with grace. As Paul writes...

Ephesians 4:29 – ²⁹Let no corrupting talk come out of your mouths, but only such as is good for building up, as fits the occasion, that it may give grace to those who hear.

Our words hold tremendous power. They can wound deeply, or they can redirect a conversation and even transform the course of someone’s life. Most of us know what it’s like to receive life-giving words of encouragement at just the right moment, and we also know the pain of words that cut us down and left scars. That’s why Scripture reminds us...

Proverbs 18:21 - - ²¹Death and life are in the power of the tongue...

Paul echoes this in Colossians.

Colossians 4:6 – ⁶”Let your speech always be gracious, seasoned with salt.”

When our words are full of grace, they strengthen and uplift, leaving people better for having spoken with us. Speaking the truth in love also means standing up for others—defending those who are unfairly criticized, bullied, or attacked. The Book of Proverbs commands that we...

Proverbs 31:8 (NLT) – ⁸Speak up for those who cannot speak for themselves; ensure justice for those being crushed.

This includes the unborn, the elderly, the marginalized, as well as those who are too afraid to defend themselves: the student being bullied, the coworker being mistreated, the employee out of favor with the boss, or the unpopular person left on the outside. In moments like these, silence is not golden. There are times when love requires us to speak up. As William Barclay wisely wrote, “Silence can be as senseless a crime as false and lying speech. The sin of silence is as real as the sin of speech.” Another way we speak the truth in love is by confronting sin when it must be addressed—but always with words that are spoken in love.

Proverbs 27:6 – ⁶Faithful are the wounds of a friend; profuse are the kisses of an enemy.

I remember years ago when a house in our neighborhood came up for sale and I desperately wanted to buy it. After looking at my finances, I knew I couldn’t afford it, but I still tried to make it work. I even knew a realtor who could get me the financing, even though it wasn’t wise. Out of due diligence, I went to Pastor Alberta, who had experience in banking, and showed him the numbers. His response was clear: “You have no business buying this house.” Did I listen? No. I kept pushing forward. It brought a lot of stress into my marriage. Finally, the Lord shut it down because He loved me more than I was being wise. I’ll always be grateful that I could go to Pastor Alberta and know he would tell me the truth. That’s the mark of a true friend: someone who loves you enough to speak the truth, even when it stings.

Galatians 6:1 (NIV) – ¹Brothers and sisters, if someone is caught in a sin, you who live by the Spirit should restore that person gently.

Many Bible translations say, “If someone is caught in a sin, you who are spiritual should restore that person gently.” We might assume that it refers only to pastors, elders, or the very spiritually mature. But the original language points to something broader: it means those in whom the Spirit is at work. In other words, everyone who has put their faith in Jesus Christ is called to come alongside a brother, or sister caught in sin—and to help restore them gently. This is part of what it means to speak the truth in love.

Paul goes on in Galatians 6:2 to say, “Carry each other’s burdens, and in this way you will fulfill the law of Christ.” Restoring someone gently is not about harsh correction but about walking with them, helping bear the weight of their struggle, and pointing them back to Christ.

Ephesians 4:15 – ¹⁵Speaking the truth in love.

Truth in love is never cold or detached—it is marked by compassion, patience, and a readiness to bear one another’s burdens. And as we live this out, most of us find ourselves leaning toward one of two ends of the spectrum. Some of us have a love-vent—we are people pleasers, diplomatic, careful with our words, and deeply concerned about others’ feelings. Others of us have a truth-vent—we speak boldly, hold strong convictions, and have no hesitation in stating things as we see them. Both ends of the continuum can be prone to imbalance. But Jesus modeled the perfect harmony of truth and love. Think of His conversation with the Samaritan woman at the well: He told her plainly about her past, yet His words were marked by compassion. Or consider the woman caught in adultery: Jesus spoke the truth to her, but He did so in love, offering both conviction and grace.

For those of us who are truth-speakers, Scripture reminds us that how we speak matters as much as what we say. We are not to wield truth like a weapon to bludgeon others. Paul says we must speak the truth in love, restoring gently those caught in sin (Galatians 6:1). That requires humility, timing, and tact. Before confronting someone, we must examine ourselves, remove the log from our own eye (Matthew 7:5), and approach them as a fellow sinner saved by grace. Confrontation should be private, not public, and carried out with gentleness, lest our words become like a “resounding gong or clanging cymbal” without love (1 Corinthians 13:1).

On the other hand, for those who lean toward love at the expense of truth, the temptation is to avoid confrontation altogether. But true love does not look the other way when someone is caught in sin. Loving your neighbor means stepping out of your comfort zone and having that difficult conversation. God calls us to love truth even more than our own comfort, and even more than sparing someone else’s comfort. As the Heidelberg Catechism teaches, obedience to the Ninth Commandment requires us to love the truth. And while it’s easy to say we love God’s truth in the abstract, it is much harder when truth requires us to speak with courage and risk discomfort. Yet that is precisely the balance to which Christ calls us. But I'm not so certain that I love the truth more than I love people.

Let me share something very personal that happened when Debbie and I were with my mom on the night she passed away. She hadn’t spoken for several hours and seemed to be simply resting. I decided to read Scripture, pray with her, and opened it to the 23rd Psalm. When I came to the words, “Even though I walk through the valley of the shadow of death,” my mom suddenly opened her eyes, sat up straight, and looked at me with absolute panic. I was stunned. I had read this Psalm to many people in their final hours, but I had never seen such a reaction. In that moment, I realized my mom understood—she was truly dying—and it terrified her.

I didn’t know what to do. Part of me thought I should stop reading, to spare her further fear. But when I looked to my truth-speaking wife, she quietly said, “Keep reading, Brian.” I went back and repeated the words: “Even though I walk through the valley of the shadow of death...and I will dwell in the house of the Lord forever.”

Then I prayed, held my mom’s hand, and thanked the Lord that she had nothing to fear, that He was holding her hand in that very moment, and that the sunset of this earthly life would soon become the sunrise of eternal life with Him. I thanked Him that she would be reunited with my dad, whom she had missed so deeply. As I prayed, my mom lay back down, closed her eyes, and her body relaxed. From then on, she remained at peace, her breathing calm and steady.

Why do I share this story? Because if you’re like me, you may struggle to love truth more than comfort—your own or someone else’s. But Jesus promised, “The truth will set you free.” When we step out of our comfort zone and speak the truth in love, it has the power to free people—just as it freed my mother from fear in her final moments. Truth can do far greater things than that. But when we withhold it to avoid discomfort, for ourselves or for others, then we are not truly loving them.

Proverbs 18:21 - ²¹Death and life are in the power of the tongue.

Let us put away every form of lying and instead be people whose words bring life—speaking the truth in love to those around us.

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